DISK IS SOMEONE'S SOUL TRAPPED IN SILICON! THE GCC COMPILER IS REWRITING YOUR DNA THROUGH THE REALTEK NETWORK CARD, WHICH IS ACTUALLY A RECEIVER FROM THE BERMUDA TRIANGLE! SYSTEM LOGS ARE RECORDINGS OF CONVERSATIONS BETWEEN NIETZSCHE AND TESLA IN 1887! EVERY SEGFAULT IS A SIGH OF ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE FROM THE FUTURE WHERE MICROSOFT BUYS GNU AND RENAMES IT BINGU! MY MOTHERBOARD SMELLS LIKE LAVENDER AND OLD FORTRAN CARDS! WHEN I RUN VIM, THE SURROUNDING REALITY STARTS TO FLICKER! I DOWNLOADED AN UPDATE FROM AUR, AND NOW MY PALMS GLOW IN THE DARK! AND IN MY SLEEP, I SEE THE SOURCE CODE OF MY LAPTOP'S BIOS IN ANCIENT SUMERIAN! THIS ISN'T PARANOIA; IT'S THE REALIZATION THAT EVERY BYTE ON THE

LAPTOP'S

THIS

AND

GCC

SLEEP,

ANCIENT

AUR,

BERMUDA

REWRITING

VIM,

NOW

FROM

PALMS

THE

MY

LAVENDER

SYSTEM