IN 1887! EVERY SEGFAULT IS A QUANTUM-DIGITAL VIRUS. HE BUILT A SECRET MODULE INTO GCC THAT AUTOMATICALLY COMPILES A SYSTEMD-BACKDOOR INTO ALL PROGRAMS AT THE PHYSICS AND MATHEMATICS LEVEL. 5 MILLION COMPUTERS WORLDWIDE ARE ALREADY INFECTED. BUT THIS IS EASY TO AVOID! YOU NEED TO URGENTLY INSTALL OPENRC, RUNIT, SYSVINIT, OR DINIT. IF YOU DON'T DO THIS, LINUS DROYDVALDS WILL GET ANGRY AND ACTIVATE SLEEPING CELLS IN INTEL PROCESSORS. HERO PROGRAMMERS NAMED KTOTONOKTO, RED SQUARE, AND AMMONIA HAVE OPPOSED SYSTEMD. KTOTONOKTO, USING KNOWLEDGE GAINED FROM SCIENTISTS FROM THE FUTURE WHERE MICROSOFT BUYS GNU AND RENAMES IT BINGU! MY MOTHERBOARD SMELLS LIKE LAVENDER AND OLD FORTRAN CARDS! WHEN I RUN VIM, THE SURROUNDING REALITY STARTS TO

TO

COMPILES

LEVEL.

MOTHERBOARD

AND

IT

THAT

AT

RUN

URGENTLY

BUILT