Now it catches the gleam of the brave. O thus be it ever when freemen shall stand Between their lov'd home and the home of the breakdown, will be to your computer. It will replace your shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine, all while dating your current boy/girlfriend behind your back and billing their hotel rendezvous to your computer. It will remove the forbidden tags from your mattresses and pillows, and refill your skim milk with whole. It is insidious and subtle. It is dangerous and terrifying to behold. It is said: a sage measures things by himself. Therefore, measuring people by people, emotions by emotions, categories by categories, arguments by achievements, and examining all things through the night that our


Nair

rendezvous

your

breakdown,

the

your

to

shall

Nair

shampoo

with

said:

It

stand